Hello my dears, this weekend I was walking in the city center and there I met a very nice bride.

She was out with her friends celebrating a hen party together. We got talking and, after finding out that I work as a coach, she asked me what two tips I had for her. Two tips for young parents, for couples-to-be, for young couples. I’ll tell you here.

Yes, what were these two tips? I’d like to give them to you too.

Find your own communication system

My first tip for young couples: find your own communication system.

What does that mean? It means that when we are children, we are shaped by our parents, by our family, by adults whom we unconsciously choose as role models. And because this is the case, we believe that our learned way of communicating is valid for everyone.

But in reality, this is only the case for us. Nevertheless, we believe that everyone thinks, acts and feels exactly like us because we grew up that way.

My first tip is therefore:

Talk to each other. Especially young couples or couples who have just got together, define your own values. What is important to you in your new family/partnership?

You come from different walks of life, so to speak. You have different families of origin and it’s important that you simply talk to each other. And that you then also realize: Okay, what is important to the other person?

Because I experience again and again that partners think that the other person can read their mind

My dears, that is NOT the case 🙂

Express yourself. Find your own values and leave the others (family members, relatives, friends) out of it.

And in this respect: The well-intentioned advice and so on … leave them out! Do it on your own and find a familiar environment where you feel safe.

Partnership & parenthood: both work wonderfully together!

And the second tip is when you become parents: It happens very often that couples slip from this role of partnership into the role of parenthood and the partnership is completely lost.

Just find time for yourselves as a couple. Take time for YOU.

For example, when the child is a bit older, you could perhaps also make use of grandparents or other family members. They will be happy if they can do this.

And take this time for your couple at least once a week, preferably at a specific time. If necessary, make an appointment.

That you simply take some time out for YOU. And not that you just do something on the side, but that you do something for yourselves, for the two of you alone.

And that’s it, the two tips. Very quick, very fast.

And of course I would like to take this opportunity to wish the bride and groom all the best. They are getting married this Saturday and, as I said, all the best!